Monday, March 30, 2015

90's Baby

"Stop daydreaming with your mouth hanging open before your lips get big!" I'm convinced that all of our grandparents and even parents once stressed these foolish "life lessons" before. Well at least for my family and I, yes. I can't begin to say how many times I thought people could randomly become "ugly looking" just by making silly face. I don't know which was worst, thinking your face could've change from silly faces, or believing having "big lips" was ugly.

Growing up in the 90s and early 2000s, black women (at least the ones I grew up watching) actually looked black! All we had was some ashy powder foundation, eyeliner and black lip liner and we looked stunning.

To me I think that's the most beautiful look ever ! But for some ridiculous reason that was also considered ugly. It was all about "thin features" and "light-to-white skin." I personally think all women are beautiful (especially in there own way.) However, call it favoritism but black women have the beauty of queens. Yes we have been oppressed for hundred of years from blacks and non blacks, focusing more on or looks and bodies, but I personally think that one reason was because of intimidation. Everyone knows beauty when they see it; it's just a matter of power, jealousy and control that prevents you from admitting it.

But to get back on topic, it's sad that I grew up in my home to think that having big lips or any full feature wasn't attractive. Despite forwarding years later and seeing more European women "trending" this African looks, and some black women going for this "European look", I still believe self pride/love should be a primary factor in your life. No one shouldn't give you the okay or thumbs up when they finally feel like admiring or even acknowledging your beauty. No man, women, white or black can ever tell me how to view myself. I am careful though; people would go as far as subconsciously trying brainwash you.

I'm just blessed that I haven't took that mentality into my adulthood, (It could've been worst). I don't blame my parents, after all that's how they been raised. What I do think is that they should have been more carefully with they words they used to describe "ugly looking" and the people associated with it, especially talking about it in the presence of their young gullible black daughters. I am glad to say I did learn a "life lesson"


  1. Wow, what an interesting topic. I personal find it strange that white people for years made unpleasant comments about blacks and some of their features. Now they are going to plastic surgeons to change their features to something they made fun o for so long.
    Wonderful read.

  2. Hi, I have nominated you for the Liebster Award! Check out the link on my page to see the rules :)

  3. this is really good, yes I remember some of those lessons, not from my mom, but from friends growing up. I'm so glad that I always embraced "my black as beautiful." I always wonder and still wonder where people get their myths and beliefs from. Good job.